it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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