we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
