If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
