Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize