The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
