Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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