Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
