Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
