WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
