Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
if only i could text you this smell
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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