Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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