She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
home. puking in laundry basket.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
