distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
