GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I think I just sharted jello shots
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
