belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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