New invention idea: vibrating tampons
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Randomize
