Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
