whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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