Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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