i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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