Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
barbara walters just said penis...
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
