i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
