Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
well most of my day revolves around power hour
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
