You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
