This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize