There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
