Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
