Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
