Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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