O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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