5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
