Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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