kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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