I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
