We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
