What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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