So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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