from now on my penis is your penis
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
