Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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