i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
