so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
