she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
