My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I currently don't understand fingers.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
