We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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