I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
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