I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
either way he was missing a nipple.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
