is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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