office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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