But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Randomize
