don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Randomize
